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Part 1

As the blobs slowly moved across the view, the intensity of the blue became brighter, and I was saying "get brighter, get brighter," and then finally it would emit a beautiful blue spatter just before it passed out of view, and I said "Yea, yea." When it passed out of sight, a new blob would be forming on the left getting brighter as it moved across again. It felt so good when that bright blue jumped out like that. My body actually felt good.

After this, I felt my eyeballs batting back and forth very fast while eyes closed. At this point I think I was half conscious in a trance, but do recall something about saying, “give me a sign” and saw an open right hand with long slender fingers and thumb held close together. There could of been four fingers. Figure 1. I didn't recall this until the next day, but knew it happened then. It was half buried and vague. This happened before they put me in the spiral. They were trying to do something like subdue me into getting ready for the spiral then. Sometimes my legs or side was fluttering and feeling light with breezes. It is vague, but there was an electrical feeling around me, even though I'm not sure what was happening.
After this, I started to feel my body floating and spiraling into my center like a progressive wedding cake tower of Babel, type spiral. It felt like my body was stretching in this spiral from the inside to the very core, and a feeling of floating and euphoria. It is such a whole feeling that is hard to define. It goes right to the center of your chest. (This is the same feeling I've felt off and on when younger.)
I was curled into a fetal position with my arms to my chest, and grabbing one wrist, with a solid feeling on that wrist; for I think there is a rod that you grab and hold onto while the spiral pulls you into the saucer. This was only a thought, but might not be true.
Some of what happened after that, I didn't recall until later the next day, after realizing I was abducted. A lot more happened later that night.

I was in a state of suspended normal reality, and didn’t think too much of anything until the next day, about mid-morning when sitting in my friend's garden, and saying "I think it has something to do with the light." Right then, the sun suddenly broke out from behind a cloud and shone on me, and I went into shock. It was only then that I realized how many strange things happened, especially after connecting the vision of looking out the saucer's bottom with all the squeaking on the roof, the orange light, and of course all the other things from focusing on the blue metallic blob to the spiral. I know this sounds hard to believe, but they must have a way of suppressing your sense of reality. When it all hit me I was shaking and my back and face were feeling a hot flash. I said "Oh my God, I've been abducted, I've been abducted," and couldn't stop shaking. I said it over and over, and went into tremors, and that was the biggest shock of my life.

Later, I recalled what had happened. There was moaning and terror and heavy breathing and feeling sexual, as if in a dream; but conversing with a reassuring spirit saying "help me," and "I love you" over and over, and being reassured I was OK. I recall saying "yea, yea," over and over, and patting myself on the chest. I don't really know what was happening then except that I was afraid. There were feelings of terror and a euphoria after that made me feel slightly sexual. I had a feeling of being carried on a cot at one time, but was breathing heavily and moaning and crying. I said, "I'm just a animal, I'm just a human," and was crying. I had much gas from eating the bean sandwiches earlier and was feeling very embarrassed about that. It seems I moaned and shook constantly as a way of releasing fear, and blocking out reality. This also made me feel centered somehow. Once I recall a flash of extreme anger, and a euphoria after that. Sometimes I thought I was still in bed, and I don't recall where I was, for it seemed I slipped in and out of consciousness. I remember thinking "I'm not going to open my eyes," because I just didn't want to see what was going on. There is one vague recall of seeing light shining through the top of a partly open door, and I was on my back with feet towards the door, as if entering. The doors hinges were on the left, judging from how it opened.
It actually wasn’t until later that day that I remembered saying “give me a sign,” and recalled the outstretched right hand that is their sign.
Later that night I awoke from a dream, and I was stoning my sister in a rage, and was so shocked and guilty, for I “knew” right then that I was a killer. I was so guilty and ashamed you can not believe. Here I am praising Jesus and I am a killer.
It was a very realistic dream. She was laughing at me as she held up a rock that I treasured. Then I felt a terrible rage, and was stoning her. I could actually see the rocks hitting her face, and her skin warping when they hit. I had a big blue rock held up and was ready to smash it down on her head, when I awoke still in a rage, and felt so very guilty. It was so real, and I was shocked at the terrible anger being felt right then. It scared me.
I think I might of been fighting them, and that dream helped me realize what a jerk I was and made me calm down. It might of been just a way of facing all those emotions, and working them through. I thought I was still laying in bed then, and am not sure what happened next, except that I went back to sleep. Maybe I was actually fighting them then. It is so hard to know what was happening exactly.

THE SAUCER RIDE This relates to the God head map.
Later at maybe four in the morning, I awoke into seeing a preview of a grid pattern, in a brief vision. (What looks like the squares around the outside of this picture. Figure 2. They are not to scale with the building complex. One square is about the same size as the whole building complex.) I saw a glimpse of the grid squares changing size rapidly from a medium altitude to a higher altitude. Then the whole picture became black. This was in black and white, and lasted maybe two seconds. At the time, I didn't have time to think, having awoke at the very moment this happened, and could feel my bed under me.
After the brief vision, and the black out of maybe five seconds, the first thing I saw was a perfectly clear vision of squares with cut corners coming from the edges of my eyes. I was “right there” one, two, or more like eight feet off the roof then, in the center of the God Head squares. It was maybe 20 or 30 feet across, considering the layout of the buildings. Very slowly or moderately it was rising, and I thought I was at the estate of a wealthy person for the architecture was very expensive looking. I thought it was on Earth, and it was where a girlfriend I was in love with at the time lived. (I thought they took me there to mate me with her, if you can believe that. I knew she was living in Petaluma at the time, but didn't know where.) I had about five seconds to view the building, as the scene slowly rose higher. Then when about 100 feet (30 meters) high, it suddenly went up so fast, it was like a zoom lens going backward. In two seconds it rose way way up. As it rose very fast, a large grid pattern covering the total area as far as you could see, came swooping into view. Than it slowed like an elevator and became perfectly still. It hovered for a few seconds, then took off like a sling-shot, and the grid just warped before my eyes and became streaks of glowing red.
The grid was made up of squares with bands between, in a crosshatch pattern, all with a red-orange fluorescent glow. Dark filled in the remaining space. This was so amazing, and it happened so quickly; maybe fifteen seconds in total. This was like being in the Washington space needle, only much much higher.

Here is another version of the takeoff: While knowing I was laying in bed, it seems that I was looking out the bottom of a vehicle slowly rising off the roof of a building. (This vision was so real; it was like a black and white TV screen in my mind, behind the eyes.) There was a square take off area seen first, close up. A building complex came into view as it rose slowly like a helicopter, to maybe a hundred feet. As it rose higher, big square tapered houses were now seen surrounding the main estate area on all sides. Then suddenly the whole scene shot upward in a very fast whooshing, and as it gained altitude, the surrounding houses fanned outward (while shrinking in size) in greater numbers. In a instant, a massive grid pattern emerged from all sides, surrounding the entire complex extending to the horizon on all sides, for miles, as far as the eye could see. The grid pattern gave a feeling of speed, direction of movement, and gaining height, just like one of the new virtual reality games. This was like you were actually there, with the emotions and the feeling of butterflies in the stomach.
It moved so fast straight up, then slowed quickly like a elevator, and made a smooth stop, becoming perfectly still. Even the feeling of bouncing up a little from the inertia, when it stops, was felt. Also, the feeling of hanging out the porthole dangling in space, with butterflies in the stomach just looking down so far. There is no other bodily feeling, except you know you're laying in bed, but are not feeling it at the time it seemed. All this was seen so clearly, as if you are directly connected to a camera. The massive grid pattern, now showed a very high height, compared to where we were, and was glowing red orange in every direction.
It was perfectly still for two or three seconds, then took off to the South, accelerating with such speed that the grid just warped before your eyes and became red streaks. The inside of your stomach just twisted, although there was no feeling of inertia.

The take-off landing pad, and building complex were in black and white, or more like tones of gray and white. At the God head building, I could see other buildings in the one area in a nice arrangement. There was a lawn or parking lot, hedges, streets, paths, cornerstones or planter boxes on every corner, and many borders around most all buildings; also paths or streets.
I had the feeling that the main building complex was lit with unseen lights that gave the whole area a gray dawn lighting effect. Later when rising fast, the grid became black and red, and everything else when seen from higher up, glowed orange red in the dark, like looking down on a big city's many streets with lit houses in-between, on a dark night. I now had the feeling it was an isolated place on the moon. The expanse was overwhelming, and it made the main building complex seem very special, being the only one of it's kind in the mass of squares. Later I thought this was the hospital they took me to, where they gave me a checkup.
The grid pattern was actually just like a massive "waffle" with the same type of tapered little squares. Each square in the grid seemed brighter on the one side that was facing, and had a darker shadowy side. Each tapered square was outlined with a neon glow of red orange light that accentuated the darker corner lines, and gave a very three dimensional effect. There was pitch black surrounding each square, and cross hatch bands of glowing red orange running between. The pattern ran in every direction, as far as the eye could see, becoming progressively smaller, until many and very fine, way way out there. The best way to imagine this, is to look at some of the virtual reality games nowadays, and then imagine it being even more real then that.

Here is another description of the saucer taking off sideways.
The saucer all of a sudden rose to a very high height which made your stomach turn. When it stopped way up there, the building complex could not be found amid the grid pattern. I recall looking directly down to find the building we took off from, but it was lost, and no bigger then one of the many now very small glowing red tapered squares.
Then the whole grid scene started moving sideways really slow, like when a big airplane starts moving on a runway, and you don't notice it at first, but then see out the windows that things are moving. It took off very slowly at first toward the south, and then picked up speed so fast that the picture of the grid bent and then became streaks before your eyes, really fast real quick, just like a sling shot. Your whole body felt it. At first the horizontal grid lines could be seen zipping by, and fading way back in the distance, but the speed increased so fast, that the lines couldn't be tracked, and the whole pattern bent and twisted up on the sides, like a rug was jerked out from underneath. In the end, all that was seen was the parallel lines being only red streaks that flashed out behind, and then all was black. It lasted maybe three seconds, and the feeling made your body twist with a fake inertia when seeing the grid accelerate. This was so fast, the only thing that comes close to describing the speed, is the beginning of the movie "Star Trek," where they take off at warp speed, but even that wasn't as realistic. This was beyond a doubt looking out the bottom of a saucer, and could not have been created by my mind, for I have never seen anything as vivid, or am capable of creating this.
I think they took me to have a medical examination, as there was evidence of certain things that probed and scraped skin, and pain where a needle was put in, and other pains. I feel that I had a complete physical, which made me feel much better about my health.
I would like to know if you think I am one of the anointed for this happened when I was reading the Bible.
The double squares with cut corners of the God head roof equals "four," or a cross or alar. (Old rock altars had a carved horn sticking up on each corner.) The saucer rising vertical equals pillar of wisdom, which equals "five," and is God’s number and symbol, as in the five pointed star. Figure 2. It took quite awhile to see this.
It took a week or two longer before I realized the God head building complex had a right arm that was the hedge, and a hand, that was the little extra wall. I wondered why that little wall was there, because I thought there was a parking lot, and saw that the cars wouldn't be able to drive in or out with that little wall there. This is tied into the book of Colossians, that I was reading the very night before. The image of the right hand I saw early on that very first night, also has meaning that ties in.

THE SMALL PUFFY CLOUD
This dream happened right about dawn, on that same first night, but it was still dark: I was at a party at the barn and girls were singing around a table. I had a glass of beer in my hand then. It was a night sky when I happened to look out at the big mountain, and saw a small puffy cloud slowly peek from behind the top of the mountain, then rose up a little; stopped, and then changed direction and zipped off. I told a girl there to look quick, because I didn't think anyone would believe me. She didn't see it. Then I awoke and heard the song on the radio was the one sung by the girls in the dream: Something about Christ is risen.
When the little cloud at first slowly rose from behind the mountain top, the full moon was right there on its left side. (On my right side as I faced it.) The little cloud then quickly rose straight up a ways, just like an elevator, (exactly like the earlier saucer vision) and came to a perfect stop. It then made the right angle direction change and headed North, zipping away. The movements were the same as the earlier vision, except for the direction change, and the fact I was now watching it leave in this dream.
The big mountain in the East is a landmark in Redwood Valley. In the earlier vision of the saucer ride, the direction it was heading was South. This means that where they come from is in the North obviously. The little puffy cloud meant they were now leaving. (One fact to remember is the concept of the "right angle" used in the direction change of the cloud, and the earlier saucer ride vision. This "right angle" was later seen a lot.)
On that mountain the sun also rises, and is like a big oil lamp or light stand. In early December the full moon rests perfectly there. When there is a halo reflecting around it, (from moisture in the air) it is quite a sight.
Right after the dream, when awake, I heard a dog with a quick nervous bark, towards the neighbors, in the direction of the big mountain.
Later that day is when it finally hit me (the sun) as I sat in my friend's garden. I realized for the first time that I was actually abducted.

THE SECOND NIGHT
On the second night when I first walked into my trailer, I recall seeing on the back of a motorcycle magazine: an advertisement of guy with a helmet on, and the thought "Each one wears a different hat," came to me then. When I first went to bed, I took my pants off and laid them as a welcome mat at the foot of my bed. I wanted to meet them again, and had the feeling there would be another visit. There was a deep dedication instilled in me that overcame my fear and the strangeness of the situation. I was in a slight trance state of euphoria and was most likely also influenced by a holy spirit.
Later the spirit came back. At first there was squeaking in the room, and I was saying "I know you're there," and was afraid, but knew I could handle it and had to stay. At times I had hostile feelings, but also had a trust and love. The feeling of its presence gradually overtook me, and later it was speaking through telepathy, telling me to love everybody; and I cried and said "I do, I do,.. I love everybody." It was yelling in a angry tone: "Love your mom, your dad, and yourself." That lasted a while. It kept saying this over and over. First It kept saying: "love your dad; you're supposed to love your dad." I was crying and saying "I do I do, I love my dad," and was in shock and afraid. Actually I had been very mad at him because he tormented me and ran me down a lot. He drank a lot and couldn't help it. Then later the spirit was saying: 'love your mom." I cried and said "I do I do, I love my mom." Actually I hated her because she tormented me, and played mind games, and we couldn't get along. A lot of it was my own fault. I was into drugs and drank a lot. The spirit also said: "Your supposed to love everybody, love everybody and everything." Later it said: "love yourself. I said "I do, I do, I love everybody and myself," and loved the spirit also, and cried and cried.
Its presence stayed with me. There was the very strong feeling that it was right there beside me. Sometimes it was calm, and I kept crying like a little kid from long ago. Obviously, I must of had a major falling out when very young, and had much rage directed at both parents. They had a rocky marriage early on, and I would cry and cry.
(The spirit actually visited me sometime in the middle of the first night, but I didn't recall. That is when I told (the tall invisible figure standing at my bed side, who I call Jeeze) my fears of dying, and maybe I have cancer or am sick. We spoke through telepathy, and I said "I don't know," and "yea yea," as we conversed awhile. It was like we were catching up on matters since we last saw each other. Somehow I knew this person from long ago, almost from another lifetime or something. He was like my other dad, who had my dad's loving side but was stern also. Later that first night when I went on the saucer ride, I thought maybe it was the hospital they brought me to, even though I once also thought it was my girlfriend's house.
Sometimes he wouldn’t reply, but seemed to be listening. When he did reply he would put a thought or a combination of thoughts in my head, that would lead to an answer. All the time I breathed deep and moaned and said "yea yea," or "I don’t know." He would tell me how much he loved me and I would cry and cry, for he had such love and an ability to draw out feelings. It was them, and now I know why I had such a lost love feeling, and still now sometimes cry and cry over them because they loved me so much. They came when I was a baby, and now they made me whole after all these years. I’m 38 and 3/4 now, and it’s amazing how the human mind is so locked up in itself.

He made me feel guilty, angry, self-pity, proud, fearful, sexual, just about everything, and would cross all these feelings in a therapy session that involved my parents, myself and him.
He conversed by putting thoughts in my mind and answered questions by stacking thoughts progressively like verses in the Bible. By the time you thought the third thought pattern, the question would answer itself, and I was so impressed. The thoughts were actually my thoughts that were speaking to me. You had the feeling of a very strong presence, and you knew he was there. There was such a strong sense of his presence sometimes, as if he were boring a beam of thought into my head. Most of the time I kept my eyes closed out of fear, but when I looked a few times, there was never anyone there.
I also had the feeling that there was a group of five others standing by watching at the foot of the bed to the side a little, and they seemed to have pity on me. All this was put in my mind. There was the one taller head being with hunched shoulders, I call Jeeze. He was standing over me to my side a lot of the time. Sometimes he was at the foot of the bed, and he had me wanting to jump out of bed and attack in that direction. I would say "no no, that's not me, I love you." They were making me do that as part of the therapy.
There was so much that happened and it lasted so long, it is hard to keep track of exactly what happened when. The spirit stayed with me for a few hours at the beginning of each night, and sometimes a while during the middle of the night, as in the first and second nights. They took a long time to just let me get used to the presence of the spirit. Overcoming the fear was a major part of the process. They kept approaching me from different angles. First working in one area with fear, and then with anger, and then with love, or with pity for myself, or with pity for others. They crossed all these feelings in a session with each of my parents and him (Jeeze), and myself.

Once on the second night when Jeeze was saying “You’re angry with me.” I was puzzled a little as to why; it seems that I had the feeling I was tricked somehow. Could it be that all this time I had been under his control without my knowing? Is it possible that they can make you deaf and dumb and then free you? They have a reason for whatever they are doing, and maybe I’m supposed to realize I've given up my free will to serve him for whatever he wants, and he is just trying to get that anger over with. Most likely it is part of a process that is on-going, and is just another part of the program to develop me to do God's will and mold me psychologically, and to heal past buried fears and angers; for it is obvious I have always been their child, but didn’t know it until now. Maybe that is why I'm supposed to be angry, but there is a much more deeper emotional attachment that has been developed and is pure love forever.
There was one time when the spirit stayed with me so long, I felt guilty, and then heard a laugh. I said "No no, that wasn’t me," for it seemed it came from me. It came at a time of odd humor, or just a laugh at the peculiarity of it all. I got this feeling that there was a dead seriousness that made me feel very guilty, for all they were doing for me. This laugh sounded just like a friend who has a real loud crackup laugh. It was so embarrassing to hear that right then.
(Now a few months later, I sometimes feel they are up there laughing at me, for it is me who feels can be the fool. But I think of that laugh often and remember it was not them laughing for they were dead serious.)

THE THREE KISSES
On the second night, I was put through extreme fear mixed with strong sexual feelings. This went on for maybe a hour. Sometimes a "clunk" sound would be heard, or a fluttering breeze feeling by my feet, that felt like floating. I moaned continuously, so not to hear, and had my eyes kept tightly shut. Later after I was worn out from so much fear and moaning, a kiss noise was suddenly heard directly overhead. This was so loud. My heart was beating so hard that my moans of heavy breathing became broken. It felt like my chest and ears were pounding. I went into shock, and started howling with the moans. At the same time, a very strong sexual feeling would overtake me. This was so unusual at a time like this. Soon after about five minutes, my fear would die down, and right about then another kiss noise came, and I then had this terror all over again, with moaning and heavy breathing trying to blot out any clunk or squeaking noise in the room. I just knew they were there. The whole room was so scary, but I knew there was no escaping. I had to face it. I shrieked and howled, and said "Take me, take me, I’m yours." Finally the last kiss came. That kind of had me in a state of happy fear, and wasn't quite as bad, even though I still had the same shuddering, with heavy breathing. My heart wasn't beating quite as hard then, and I was a little amused and relieved, knowing that this was the final kiss, for some reason. They can induce all these emotions. All during this time I was given strong sexual feelings off and on, and I kept thinking they wanted me to breed. For a while I was just in this state of hoping they would hurry up and use me for breeding, and even imagined that a sample of sperm was being extracted from my penis into a cup. I kept fantasizing about different girls, off and on. First one, and then another, and then a third. It made me feel a little guilty, not having respect for women except for sex. That is when I saw a image of me walking down a hill with cloven feet. My feet were like goat's feet. I saw myself from behind, like I was out of my body observing myself. At first I thought it meant I was a beast, and later realized that this meant: "You are dead in sin."

Later during the night of the three kisses, I was still afraid for a long time. I kept trying so hard to go to sleep for a hour or more, but couldn't. It just went on and on. I kept thinking "If I could only go to sleep, this would be over." It just dragged on forever.
What happened later that night, I'm not sure, but I awoke in the very early morning and had the feeling the spirit was by my side and ready to help me. It was calm and I felt that something had happened but wasn't sure. That is when I asked the spirit if I was a father. There was a long silence, and I became worried it wasn't really true. Then a thought finally came after about ten seconds: "All life is precious." That kind of gave me hope that it was true, and I was a little shocked, thinking this really happened. It was all so amazing, and there was a seriousness in the air. Then I asked the spirit: "What should I tell people?" There was no answer, but I found myself suddenly putting two (index and middle) fingers over my shut lips. Thought it meant to keep it secret then, but now think this was just a way of speaking. Maybe it did happen and should not be told. This was in the early morning and the spirit stayed by my side like a friend for a long time. He was just there, and acted in debt to me, and I uttered thoughts and spoke to him, (all with mental telepathy, like I had done this before) on a level like I was a child and he was my long lost dad. I can't recall what all was said, and it was more like he was reassuring that he cared and was just there for me. He stayed and stayed until I felt guilty like I wasn't this important. That's when I heard the loud laugh, and I said "No no, that wasn't me." He kept staying there a while, I knew; and felt guilty, like I wasn't this important. Then I even felt I wished he would go, and this made me feel really guilty. It seemed he wanted me to know he truly cared for me.
There was another scene of the warped shape shifting splotches of blue moving across the back of the eyes for awhile. This same thing was happening on the very first evening. This is a method of calming you. Soon it was over and his presence seemed to be no more, and it was just getting light. All this was on the second night.
There was one time earlier, when he first came that night, when I was overwhelmed; I said "Where; how... how did you get here?" The first image seemed very important, and then it seemed to of been lost from my mind suddenly, and I felt very upset, and tried so hard to recall for a few moments. Right then is when a perfect vision of a right angle frame appeared. I think the very first thought image was like going down a tube in a swirling effect, but I'm not sure; it was just this feeling. Figure 3.

This right angle vision was the first perfect vision, other then the saucer ride the night before. Just like a black and white picture of a very light gray or blue background with the dark lines. The flap on this was moving slightly, and was a little off center. Also, the whole thing was spinning very slowly, about a quarter turn, and little Lasted 4 to 5 seconds. Figure 4.

This vision appeared ten seconds after the right angle, and was rotating slowly. It was actually a miniature picture with live people on a city square or plaza, and also turned almost sideways. The people seemed to be guys and gals in their Sunday best, taking a stroll on the park plaza. The men had suits and hats, and the women had long dresses and fancy hats, of the nineteen forties fashion style. The cloths were dark to gray tones. There was a perfect line like a wall I was focusing down on that separated the two sides, which were both exactly the same. This was also a black and white picture. Lasted maybe 4 to 5 seconds. Figure 5.

Later the next day, I was driving to San Francisco delivering wine as if nothing had even happened. It was that easy, and I was in a calm trance state and not even shocked about the events happening. I even looked forward to seeing them again, and had a renewed love, and a love for life.

During the early part of the evenings, the spirit would often speak using different song verses on the radio. One of the most common ways of conversing with the spirits is a idea will enter your head for a while, and you will ponder the idea. Then right when the thought process is played out, and you come to the conclusion; then as if by coincidence, a song on the radio will have a verse that exactly answers and gives a good reply. This has happened many times. They played songs about the lamb; he is risen. While hearing that I would go into either pity, or a feeling of shock and amazement that they were saying I was Jesus or a Christ. It was such an overwhelming feeling. They were treating me like royalty and would pour emotions of love on me when certain songs with a message played. My lost love for them was often brought to the surface, and I cried and cried for all they had done. My love for them goes way back and is impossible to put a finger on who or what. All I know is: "it is them; the ones who loved me so much." I just couldn't believe I was so special having always had a low self esteem and ran myself down; I didn't feel worthy of this, and knew what a hateful selfish and angry person I really was. Somehow they overlooked all that. When the spirit is working it is hard to describe, but thinking back on that, it seemed like an altered state of reality.

THE THIRD DAY
On the third day, during the storm and flood of January 21, I woke up that morning, and there was a warm glow in the room. I couldn’t remember a thing, and thought I had slept like a log all night, but was so tired. Later that morning while my brother and I were looking at the swollen rivers and lakes during high flood, the first picture came back of what happened that night.

(Here continues the astounding story of a young man who calls himself Jesus freak (Isus cudovste) and believes he was abducted by kind aliens from god and taken to another planet for therapy. He was reading Colossians when he was picked up. He wants the Family Radio Network to help get his story out, but they ignore him . Can you imagine? - Marco)

THE RED SEA
I was standing at the back of a large group of people by a large red-orange sea with a similar sky. There was a man standing there waving a stick or a rod at the water’s edge, as if saying “Someday all this will be yours.”
Out on the red sea way off in the distance there were small circles connected together like lily pads, just barely visible through the fog, which was orange-red, as was everything else. ( Shaligram story - domestic language,Saligram prica ) The circles laid perfectly flat on the water, and there were spires that rose out of the water through the fog to enormous heights. Really high. There were three spires, one being the largest and closest, and two others off in the distance lost in the fog. The spires were the shape of the Christian fish symbol, except much thinner.

Later that day I just hung out and visited with my family, and tried to tell some people what was happening, and was in a calm state, considering all that was happening. Thinking back, it seems there was a spirit that mixed with mine, and made it all so casual, even though I often felt it was totally out of this world. It really was; and those first times will always be remembered as some of the most special times in my life. I was getting used to the idea that my long lost family had returned after all these years, but it was so strange because I wasn't sure who they were. Just all the emotional feeling was felt. It is still that way; I'm still not sure who they are. The amazement of the unreal way they can speak is still so out of this world. There is no other word for it.

THE THERAPY SESSION
The final meeting with Jeeze seemed like the fourth day they came, but was actually the tail end of the third day, heading toward midnight. They left right before midnight on this evening.
I had a major therapy session that lasted for at least four hours it seemed; maybe not quite.

I cried and moaned and shrieked continuously until there just wasn’t anything left. The power of this spirit was so amazing, and the intelligence beyond anything on this earth. It had the power to dig inside and pour out my lost hidden self, and just literally tore me to shreds and pieced me back together. The ability of this force is beyond description, to be able pull things out I hadn’t thought of in years, that lay buried since childhood. Feelings of terror, anger, self-pity, love, jealousy, rage, longing for love, abandonment, love of them, and of my parents. All this was done without me ever seeing or even talking, or it talking to me. It was all done through telepathic thought and induced emotions. I cried and moaned most of the time.

It wasn't until later the next day before I even remembered the whole first part of the walk with the Lord.
I had much love for them, for when I was a baby and cried, they came down and saved me. They patted me on the chest and said "Yea yea, good, you’re good you’re good." They said it over and over, and made me whole.
At least five or six times when younger, I recall that euphoric spiral feeling, either when just falling asleep, or waking; but consciously I had lost them. I always felt there was a part missing; a part of lost love that I wasn’t sure where it was; a nostalgic feeling that was hard to find where it originated. At certain rare times when younger, I didn't know what the nice spiral feeling was, and thought it unusual, but couldn't ever remember anything else.

During the therapy session, they would build me up until I was proud, and then tear me down again, and would scare me so bad that I was in total fear. In the end they just let me die; it was so terrible. You can’t imagine what self-pity. During the power of a windy storm in an old beat-up trailer with tin and plywood blowing out the windows, with crashing and the feeling of utter destruction of the trailer blowing down the hill, they instilled a fear in me, that is now my strength and humbleness, if you can believe that.
Finally at the end of the last night, there was (after a therapy session and I had cried myself dead) a vision of Jeeze in a robe walking out the tunnel at the movie theater in Ukiah. I could see the waves of the red curtains that he pushed aside on the way out. I thought, “What does that mean?” Then I saw the Exit sign. Then the thought “The show’s over” came. I howled in amazement. I then got up and wiped my eyes and looked out the window seeing two red orange eyes watching. It was the orange cat sitting on a large rock. (I'll talk about the therapy later in more detail)


THE WALK WITH GOD
Before the red sea scene, there was another scene that took a few days to remember. It started in a vague dream of getting off the ski-lift gondola at a mountain ski lodge, and stepping out on the metal grate. Then I was walking up a curved path with a rock wall on the one side, and seeing flowers in a field to the right as we approached the top. I was with a friendly father figure on my left, who was leading me by the hand as we first walked up the five steps leading to a large rectangle of perfectly level cut grass, surrounded with borders around the edges, of perfectly smooth white marble or cement, with not a single crack or seam. (• Figure 5A.) The grass was exactly level with the white rock-like borders around the edges, that were maybe twenty feet wide. The grass and boarders combined was maybe as large as a football field.
When first walking up the steps, I saw the ground level of the grass field first come into view at eye level, and it was very realistic. I then looked to the right once, and saw that the plaza extended out a ways than just dropped off into space with nothing beyond. There was a low square planter box in either corner edge over there, and the tops had a flat edge around them that overhung a little. I don’t remember seeing a plant in them.
The guy on my left stood back once to let me get a view of the big green grass field and white borders.
There was a white rock embankment wall stretching way down, that was maybe fifteen feet high. It had thick green ivy growing down the side, or hanging over the top a few feet, that formed a perfect wave pattern.

THE POOL AND SEVEN PILLARS
Next he held my hand as we walked up another flight of step, maybe seven. There was a banister hand rail that ran up the center of the steps, making two lanes. (This is similar to the courthouse steps in my local town of Ukiah.) We walked on the left side up the stairs and came upon a large rectangle full of smooth water with pillars around it. It was the size of a regulation size swimming pool, or smaller, and filled right to the brim like the red sea, and gave me such a full feeling. But at the red sea and sky the feeling was even better with a whole feeling and also a warm glow. Anyway, the large pool wasn’t red but maybe blue green earth light reflection on the water, but perfectly smooth. Around the border of the pool stood seven pillars, one on each corner and one in between each side, except at the back where there was a pile of rocks with water splashing down. (There was a damp cool feeling down toward the splashing water that reminded me of cool rocky streams I used to climb up when hiking the big mountain where I live.) One thing that was odd was that the splashing water didn't make any ripples on the glass smooth water of the pool, that had a blue green reflection of light off it. It also seems there was a single group of three small lily pads in a triangle, and with little flower like stems sticking up in the middle, and this was in the very center of the rectangle pool, but forward towards us some.
I think there were square tops and double square bases on the pillars. The pillars around the pool were also on a smooth rock or cement border surrounding the pool. It looked just like an old Roman pool with pillars around it, but seemed like a ruin because there was no roof. There was a shady cool feeling about it. At the back the chunks of rocks were stacked up almost unnaturally as if somebody tried to make a natural looking garden with rocks and water splashing down.
When we first came to the pool, the guy I was with let go of my hand and then stepped back so I could see the pool.


THE BRIGHT LIGHTS AND RED CARPET
Then the person to my left was holding my hand again, and he said "Look up there," or “Now let’s go up there.” (I had this feeling.) He moved aside a little, and when I looked up, there were massive steps really broad, with so much bright light up there that your eyes hurt. I looked away for a moment and then looked again. We were looking up at the table on top of the huge pile of stairs that tapered up like a pyramid, but the table couldn't be seen, and I had to shield my eyes it was so bright.
There must have been fourteen or more steps. Then a red band six to eight feet wide started rolling down the steps, maybe two thirds of the way or more; and I then got scared when I thought it looked like blood. I must of passed out, because I don’t remember walking up the red carpet, although I’ve tried to imagine it.
The red carpet flowed down the steps like liquid. I remember looking at the leading edge to see how. It appeared like a curtain that is dropping at a movie theater, except smaller. It was about a little more than halfway down when I first saw that, and became afraid.
It flowed moderately fast, like thick paint running down a wall, and there was a great fear when I thought of blood. The next thing I remember is I was looking at him and me sitting there at the table. It seemed that I wasn’t in my body because my body was in front of me obviously. I think this was the only time that something like this happened, for when I think back it is very peculiar.
(This also happened when I saw myself with cloven feet walking down a hill. This was the night of the sexual fantasies. It must mean "You are dead in sin.")

THE CHAIR AND TABLE
The next thing I remember was I was standing up by the empty chair, and the lights seemed much brighter now. Then he said “OK you sit here,” and there was a square stool with four legs and a soft cushion on top that he pulled out for me. It seemed there was another place at the table to his left, for there was a third empty place, but there was no chair there, which gave a slight unbalanced feeling, because there were three candles across the table. I thought that empty place must be for the Holy Ghost.
It seems I was then checking out the chair very carefully as I grabbed it getting ready to sit down. It was a square stool chair with a creamy white fine upholstery semi-smooth material. The legs appeared to be of shiny varnished oak that had yellowish color. The legs were rather thin and straight one by threes two and a half feet high. The top of the chair was about twenty inches wide, and across: a perfect square. There was no back to it, and there did not appear to be wood around the sides of the top.
I pulled it back a little and sat down, sinking in like an air pillow at first, but then it felt like high-density foam. Once you sank in, it was firm.
The top was maybe four inches thick, and was the most comfortable chair I have ever sat on. It seems I remembered the chair very well. It was a fine piece of furniture that I am going to try to copy.
The chair must be important because they made me focus a lot of attention on it, and it was a very realistic physical experience where my body was in contact with something. Even when the guy was holding my hand, I don’t really remember feeling it. But no, that is not true: for when we came to the top of each series of steps he would let go of my hand and let me walk ahead by myself a little, and that way I would be able to see the view better.
The stools could of even had cut corner angled leg braces on the inside of the square frames. This was similar to the cut corners on the God head roof. The cut corners also resemble the points of the four horns of the Old Testament sacrificial alters.

THE TABLE
Before I sat down, I remember seeing light shining through the wavy white table clothe from behind, where it hung over the side of the table. After I sat down, I was checking out the tablecloth and feeling it between my left thumb and forefingers, where it hung down over the edge about eight inches. It appeared to have one more cloth under the heavier top cloth of thick high quality fine weave, but was smooth and slippery like silk.
On the table were three candlesticks, the one in the middle being the tallest, and the flames were bright orange. There was a goblet or large heavy wine glass to my left between us, and there was a thin square medium-sized book on the table in front of me, turned sideways a little.

The light from the candle flames was a very orange yellow, and white bright lights reflected everywhere. The light was a extremely bright dissipated white with a misty glare from somewhere in front of us, but I couldn’t really see over there. It was coming from behind the table, and it was almost like being in a cloud. I had the feeling that there was a sheer drop-off right behind the table, (like the drop-off on the back of a tall cement dam in the hills above the old Mendocino State hospital my dad used to work.) I was in a daze, and half immobilized somehow.
I looked toward him once, as he sat slightly hunched at the shoulders. He was on a higher stool then I, and he towered over me. I recall seeing slight waves in his robe at the shoulders on his back, and he was calm and collected, and I never saw his face.
Another odd thing is that the personality of the person I was just with in the earlier walk was different than the one now sitting at the table, who reminds me of my girlfriend’s dad who is very tall and is a serious strong type. The guy I was just with earlier was some other kind of personality like my old boss at the store who was very friendly.

THE GOBLET
The shape of the goblet at the table was a rather low large heavy glass as high as a wine glass but with a big bowl and foot. I remember looking into it at one time, and saw a small diamond shaped crystal appear in the back of the bowl, as the light reflected through. There was only maybe an inch of wine in it. I think he slid the glass over to me and motioned or said to drink. It is very vague but I think I remember drinking, but am not sure.

THE BOOK AND CANDLES
I do not remember writing my name in the square thin book turned slightly sideways in front of me.
I recall once looking up at the candle in front of him. The flame seemed to be flattened out in a very thick bright yellow orange, and was moving in a slow motion wobble, pointing in my direction, and my eyes hurt and I had to look away. There could have been double stepped square bases on the bottoms of the three candlesticks, similar to the pillars around the pool.
I was in a trance-like state it seems, and he never really turned or looked at me, and I never saw his face. He was solemn and very still the whole time, and there was a sense of strength and seriousness. Only once it seemed he motioned toward the cup as if saying to drink, for it seems he slid the cup over between us. The whole time I was in such a daze; I just stared in front of me, for everything seemed blurry, except when I focused on individual objects. Thinking back on that, I was glad I didn't act smart or say anything, because it was a very serious time. Sitting at the table lasted maybe three or five minutes.
Then all of a sudden we left the table, and I’m not sure if I remember getting up or walking away. All of a sudden he was there and seemed happy and was grabbing my arm and hand, and we were walking away from the right side of the table and heading toward the church. He turned his head toward me and appeared excited, saying “We’re going on a tour.” His personality now reminded me of my father when he would give tours to people on our ranch. He now wasn't really tall like the father figure I had just sat next to at the table.
One could say, “Ha ha, you only had a dream;” but God is the dream-maker, and obviously can create what you need to see, such as a image of one you look up to or respect. As everyone knows: “God is the father.”

THE LOOKOUT PLACE
After we left the table and were heading down a walkway I thought was similar to the top of the cement dam, we then came to a right angle corner in the path. Right before we turned left at the corner, I turned towards the right and wanted to look all the way back down. There was a small lookout plaza there that extended out from the other drop-off wall a ways. It was a square viewing area, and there were two low square empty planter boxes at each corner near the edge on the lookout platform. These were just like the two empty planters on the plaza at the grass field level. It seemed the edge just dropped to nowhere, for there was nothing beyond. It was like the edge of a cliff, and I got the little feeling in my stomach when you know it is a long way down. There was not even a guard rail, and I didn’t go over to look.
It seemed I looked back to get a feeling of where I had been, or where I was going. I think I was a little nervous for it was very high up. I was still in the slight trance they had put me in because I was afraid.

THE GUY IN THE CHURCH
Then we turned the "right angle" corner area near the lookout, (Recall the idea "right angle.") and the guy with me was very friendly, and reminded me of my dad when he was happy. He was holding my hand as we walked across a plaza to an old square church on the right side of the road, or path. It had reinforced corners all the way up the sides that went above the flat roof a little, and looked like the points of a crown. There was a big old double door with a rounded top, and one door was open part way. Someone was leaning out and we talked to him. The person on my left said something like “We’re taking a tour," and the guy in the door said “All right, well, have a good time.” Something like that. I just had this feeling. The guy in the church door seemed to really make me feel special like: "all-right, let’s feel right at home," and the whole atmosphere changed from one of real seriousness to "let’s go out on a tour."

THE OLD ABANDONED BUILDING
As we walked past the church a little, I saw an old empty abandoned building on the left, caddie-corner across the street from the church. It had a very small door to the left a little, and a lower roof than the church, that was also flat. It seemed abandoned, and there was an empty feeling when I saw that. There was a old buckled cracked sidewalk in front, and an old man with a bent back was pushing a wheelbarrow down the sidewalk in the same direction we were headed.

THE SIPHON PLACE
We kept walking down the straight path; then on the right past the church a little ways we came to a field with furrows, but no plants. There was a narrow irrigation ditch full of water across the front that bordered the field. I thought I was in the Central Valley. We then kneeled down, and he was so enthusiastic, and said “See, we just siphon the water down into the rows and fill up the rows with this pipe. He let me do it, and I grabbed the short curved pipe and set it in, and the water took off down the siphon hose. I could just feel it sucking with a "whoosh" whirlpool effect, and I said “Wow I can really feel it sucking.” He said, “Yeah,” and I could see it start to fill the first rows. In the one row I had focused down, there was a perfect shimmering silver sword shape, as the water was flowing down the row filling it up. It was bright silver and shimmering from the light reflecting off the water. This was so clear. The whooshing feeling was also so real, as I held the suction pipe.
I thought it meant that this is the double edge sword that I died under and was reborn to a new life in Christ, to be planted again in his field behind the church on the right side, to be his servant and to be harvested later; and being on the right side, having already come under judgment, am planted again to be watered with the double-edged sword to serve and grow in him again. That was my first interpretation after they first came to me, and I was filled with the spirit to tell the world, and became a fanatical evangelist. Now I feel this could also represent the hybrid breeding program.

Part 2