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Part 2
He treated me so special then; I will never forget that; and I later wondered, “Did he do that for everyone?” He then got up and left me abruptly, which was disappointing. I got up and went to follow after him, and walked down the path a ways hoping to catch up, and then saw a crowd of people in the wide path. I now found myself standing on tip toes at the back of a crowd, trying to see what was going on. Then I saw him in the distance at the back corner of the field on the left, where one straight path crossed another. He was waving a stick over the field's corner with his right arm. I had the feeling he was saying "This will be harvested." He waved the rod in a curved arch from his right to his left. He had a white robe on, and must have been standing on a raised pallet, because he was a little higher so all could see. Also, the people kind of glowed, and I couldn't really see anyone specifically. I just had the feeling there was a large crowd there. Obviously the crowd was already gathered, and that is why he had to rush off. It seemed odd that I was treated so special, but that's the way it happened. There were also other blocks of fields further out, where straight paths crossed at right angles. (Note the idea "right angle" again.) The cross is the path the Lord walks between the fields of the Lord.
Later at the red sea, he was waving his stick out in front of all of the people again. This time I could see that all the people had white robes on. I don’t remember how we got back from that place. (This scene was actually recalled before the first part of the walk, but I knew it happened at the end. That is just the way they did it.)
At the field, when he waved his right hand with rod from his right to his left, it must of meant that this field would come under judgment and be resurrected on his left. He was facing us when we saw him. At the red sea we were all standing to his right, and he waved his rod with right hand from his left to mid-body out in front of him, saying “This will be all yours.” Since we were all to his right then, we were under judgment. When he was standing at the corner of the field, we were to his left as he faced us, and the field was on his right, meaning that it was under judgment. All the time I walked with the Lord, he was on my left holding my hand it seemed. Also, when I sat at the table I was on his right.
THE RED SEA
The next scene (was actually recalled first, but I knew it came next) is that the walk ended at the red sea and sky, and I don’t remember how we got there. It was such a good feeling from the very center of my chest. My whole body felt so whole, and the inside of my chest seemed to just expand or float. It was something about the red-orange color that was everywhere. The whole sky was a fuzzy cotton candy red-orange, and it reflected off the water with such a warm feeling. The water was as smooth and still as glass and glowed a red- orange, and the huge lake was filled to the very brim as if it were going to flow right onto the pavement. It seemed there were no edges where the water and shore met, and it gave me such a full feeling in my chest and such a warm feeling.
I remember looking into the sky for a sun, and there was what almost seemed like a small section of puffy cloud that was separate from the sky, but not really. The whole sky just radiated a glow of dissipated light, and there was no glare, but only a calm kind of light, even though the sea reflected a deep shiny glow.
THE THREE SPIRES
Way way out on the water in the reddish fog there were three massive extremely high towers similar to the Christian fish symbol, that towered through the clouds or haze way out over the lake. There was one that was higher than the others, and more visible, maybe because it was closer. The others were partly lost in the red clouds off in the distance, they were so high. The tops actually appeared again above the clouds. Like the three candles on the table, they were similar in that way. I think that there were three legs on each one, even though you only saw two when seeing it from the side. That is why it looked like the fish symbol, except much more skinny.
A fish's tail even looks like a triangle, and propels it through the water. Could the spires also hold a further secret of the way light bends in a arc? Space bends at the speed of light. Maybe electrical impulses or light travels in the same arch. On earth as it is in heaven. Each spire has three legs, and there are three spires, making a total of nine legs. This number relates to the months it takes for a baby to be born, and must have other meanings. Spire is similar in spelling to spine, and even has the same arch shape.
The curved top of the church door might mean: "bringing together all of my people with a sweep of the hand." This same waving of the hand is seen at the field, and also the red sea. The shape is like a rainbow. The direction of the waving of the stick was from the South to East when at the field, and from the North to East when at the red sea.
THE FLOATING CITY
And way way out there, flat and thin on the water, barely visible on the edge of the red haze, were what looked like small (actually gigantic) circles connected like the leaves of a lily pad. It seemed like a large city was made up of circles that float on the water like lily pad leaves. I tell you the truth. Can you believe this? I can, because I was there.
THE GRADUATION
Once again there was a group of people all in white robes, kind of glowing, and once again I was at the back of the pack, and he was there standing on the left side by the shore and waved his stick from his left (North) to the center of his chest straight out in front of him toward the open sea in the East.
What is odd is that I had a clear image two nights before of the South end parking lot on Lake Mendocino. It's a big rounded parking lot surrounded mostly by water right on the lake. When I saw this image two days before, I was thinking "Maybe they are telling me that's where they landed in the flying saucer." I thought they came in one, but now realize they can be there without a saucer. At the time I didn't know exactly what to think, and just recalled it. It was that scene, and seeing the other full small reservoir with my brother, that connected with the dream of the red sea from the night before. There were three reservoirs that brought the idea together. This was Jan. 22, my father's birthday.
Lake Mendocino is the largest mass of water in this area, and the big parking lot was similar in the dream. The guy waving the stick and the crowd of people were actually in the same setting of the parking lot of Lake Mendocino, except the whole scene was glowing orange red. The slope of the parking lot was perfect, because it allowed everyone to see, similar to the slope of a movie theater that tapers toward the back. It was exactly this way in the dream also. (• Figure 6.)
It was a whole day more before I recalled the first major walk with God. They can release the memory at certain times obviously.
BIBLE VERSES
Other Bible verses relating to this story are Gal. 2:9, II Cor.12 When I heard the children’s voices. Gal. 4:19, 28 says how one is to come to God as a child. The three-day encounter is symbolic of the Trinity.
Heb. 4:12 tells of the water that is starting to fill the first ditch in the right hand field behind the church where I put the siphon hose in to move the water and set the sword in motion.
This is evidence beyond a doubt! Wouldn’t you agree? Rev.17:1 The prostitute who sits by many waters. Rev.17:15 The waters are people, crowds, nations, languages.
Rev. 21:18 As pure as clear glass. Rev. 21:21 The street of the city is of gold as pure as clear glass. Rev. 21:22 But I didn’t see any temple in it because the Lord God the Almighty and the lamb are its temple. Rev. 21:23 And the city doesn’t need any sun or moon to give it light, because God’s glory is its light, and the lamb is its lamp.
Rev. 21:24-27, Rev. 22:1 This is similar to the rocks behind the small pool of water that had the seven pillars around it, but is not the same picture exactly.
Rev. 22:3 This talks of the throne of God but not the table. Rev. 22:5 They will not need a sun explains the sunless sky of the red-orange sky.
Rev. 22:6 This is overwhelming evidence for Brother Camping to read.
Rev. 22:9-12, Rev. 22:16 Says I Jesus have sent my angel.
Rev. 22 17-21 Amen.
Rev. 14:13,12, Rev. 14:14-16 This reminds me of when I walked with the Lord from the table, past the church, and we talked to the person leaning part way out of the door of the church that had corners on the roof like a crown. Then we walked out into the field where we first put the siphon hose in, to water the field behind the church on the right. Then he left me and went to the far end of the field on the left, and waved his cane from his right to his left. Anyway, does anybody there see any similarity?
The abandoned empty building caddy corner to the church on our left as we walked out into the field. This could be related to Rev. 14:13.
Also, remember that there was a lot of light up there around the table when I sat next to the Lord. I don’t remember a crown on his head, but the church had tips or corners, and with a flat roof like a crown.
It is very clear that a person came out of the temple and said something to us, but I don’t remember him saying that. He just kind of replied with a friendly response; for the person I was with said something like “We’re taking him on a tour,” and the person in the door said “Well, have a good time.” Something like that. And later, when he waved his cane across the field he seemed to be implying; for I had this feeling in my head that he was saying “And I will harvest all this.” This is very similar as it is obvious the sequence of events is overwhelming!
Rev. 15:5 This is the same as the scene of the Olympic-sized swimming pool full of water to the brim, (Water represents people, nations. Rev. 17:15.) with the seven pillars surrounding it. (Proverbs 9:1) The rocks at the far end, and the water flowing out is God’s Word, and the fact that there was no roof on it and appeared as a ruins, it is obvious. I am just totally amazed, for as you can see, it even says, “(After this I saw the temple of the tabernacle containing God’s word in heaven opened.) The seven angels etc., obviously represent the seven pillars.
Rev. 16:1,6,15,18 I have found that these verses have things of relevance also.
Rev. 18:24 This also has relevance maybe.
Rev. 10:7, Rev. 20:11,12, Rev. 21:3-7, Rev. 20:15, Rev. 19:8,9,10, Rev. 19:11,12-16
Here are some other important verses. 3 John 9-15, 2 John 7-12, 1 John 4:1-6, 1Pet. 1:24, 1Pet. 2:4, 2Pet. 2:4,
Heb. 8:1-5, 7-13 This is the most important one.
Hebrews 11 talks about faith. Other important verses are 2 Cor. 10:9-11, 2 Cor. 11:16-23,28,31, Cor. 12:1-, Cor. 11:25, Cor. 12:10, 12, Cor. 3:10,14,15, Gal. 1:6-10,11-17, Gal. 2:9, Gal. 2:5,14-16, Gal. 3:1-5,10-12, Gal. 3:6-18, Eph. 1:3-14, Eph. 3:2-9,14-21, Col. 2:3,8,14,15, Phil. 2:5-11, Phil. 3:7-12, Col. 2:18,19-23, Col. 3:1-4 Col. 3:15-17,23-25, Col. 4: 3-4,6 Col. 4: 10,12,13,16,17, etc.
The four "P's" are providence, provision, protection, and promise. Heard this on Family Radio.
The colors in the walk with God are red, white, green, and yellow. Father-spirit-light-yellow. Word-water-baptism-white. Holy ghost-blood-word-red. These three are one. Green is earth and heaven. This might be a little off, but (1 John 5: 6-7 talks of the trinity in heaven and on earth.) I learned this on Family Radio.
Symbols of duality are planter boxes, entrance way to Godhead building, the two squares on the roof of that building which I thought was the hospital they brought me to, also the entrance way, and the two halves of the church door.
The half circle is obvious in the top of the church door, and the arch of the rod when he waved it across the field.
The pillars with square bases, and the saucer taking off the square roof are similar, and is also like the candles. The rod in his hand is similar also.
Other symbols to look for are the veil, holding the Lords hand, lily pads, the table cloth, the rod, robe, blood, drink from cup, carpet, church, promised land or red sea, royal corners of church, curved church door, planter boxes, and no plants, or plants (ivy), book of life, straight and narrow path, paths that cross, fields, furrow rows in field (up and down), candles, light sky, color red, silver or white, yellow, green, cornerstone, rock waterfall, spring, flowing water, still water, spiral shape hidden in the four progressively sized rectangles (golden mean spiral), retaining wall for the hanging ivy, the Lord's table, square roof of Godhead building with one square inside the other and with tapered corners. (Resembles sacrifice altar, similar to the church roof, also the two chairs.)
Could it be that the many borders represent a force field, and the rod a transfer device, and the spiral feeling is that device in motion? Could rays of light represent the rod, or energy of some sort? Also the three sets of stairs or steps, each with a different number of steps is seen. The handrail up the center of the second set of stairs is like at the courthouse in my town, water smooth as glass and filled to brim, the pyramid and mountain of stairs, empty abandoned building, old man with wheelbarrow, person in door of church, father figure in robe, cloud of bright lights at Lord's table looked like a birthday or wedding cake, the cup and wine, diamond on cup's side reflecting light, empty third chair at table, orange flame on candle, balcony where I looked back, other empty set of planter boxes on lower balcony, water dam drop-off behind table, three different father figures, silver sword shape of shimmering water in row, the siphon place and the hose, red sea, spires, white robes, others in white robes, seeing the crowd in white robes twice, floating lily pads city, the red fog, the man pointing the rod toward the East over the red sea.
THERAPY
The therapy lesson on the last evening was a mixture of emotions from anger mixed with guilt, to fear mixed with love, to sexual feelings mixed with both, and endless moaning and crying. They would cross all possible factors, and have a object in view that was either my mom, dad, or him.
During the major therapy, Jeeze stood at a distance at the foot of the bed, for I recall having the feelings of wanting to jump up and attack, lashing out in that direction. Then I would face a terrible guilt, and feelings of my love and dedication for them would conflict. This also happened while I'm telling my mom how much I love her.
They can induce all this with telepathy. All this is hard to explain, but I was helpless, and knew I had to go through with it. It was a force beyond my mind that knew me totally.
There was the terror of the fear of God blowing wind and knocking down tin, and almost blowing the trailer over. At times I was fighting him in a rage, and then a terrible fear of his wrath came upon me, and the trailer would shudder with a big gust of wind. Then there is a calm session for awhile, and feelings of love poured out on me, and then feelings of me feeling sorry for myself. Than I said "Why me?," and then heard the "kiss" noise at a distance past the foot of my bed, and then a thought is thrown in my head: "Because we love you."
There was the fear of my dad jumping out at me while I'm in terror, and there is me jumping out at God while I'm saying how much I love him. There is me jumping out in anger at my mom while I'm telling her I love her, and the fear of my mom attacking me.
There is guilt crossed with love, and anger crossed with love or guilt, or sex. There is fear thrown in very strongly, and then a session of love. A crossing back and fourth in a knitting way. There is a tearing down and then a building up, and all the while I am in a state of total moaning and sobbing, and convulsions.
Once I saw an image of my Mom by the stove, where she used to always hangout, and my Dad sitting at the end of the table, where he would always sit and read. Then there was a session of "Your supposed to love your mom, your mom." Then "Love your dad, your dad." I would say "I do I do," over and over, and would actually feel it. Then the spirit said "Love yourself, you're supposed to love yourself" over and over, and I said "I do I do, I love myself."
I used to have so much hate, it took over my life, and I dwelled on it every day. It was killing me, and I would of died an early death for sure. I turned to alcohol and drugs.
In each session I would cry about two minutes or more between each thought process. There was a way of making the emotions just pour out, that you never thought possible, with crying and moaning, repeating over and over, saying "Yeah yeah, I do I do, oh oh, I didn't mean that, I'm sorry, I don't know, oh Jeeze, I love you, I love my mom, I love my dad, I love everybody, everything." Even "Love everything" was thrown in finally, and the thought of all the earth and everything came to view. The thoughts were just thrown into my head, and the emotions kept me in a fit that I never thought possible.
Then there was a period of the spirit would say "I know you're angry with me," and I would say "No no, you saved me." Then a thought would come from me, saying "You tricked me," and I would feel guilty and say "No no, you saved me, I love you, it's not me," again and again. Then at one point I felt justified in some way I couldn't put my finger on and I actually said "OK, were even," and felt proud or arrogant for a moment. Then all of a sudden the wind ripped in and blew the plywood off the window, and into the room with a bang, and the trailer just shook. I could hear the tin crashing outside, (for nothing was nailed down, and I had leaned wood and tin up over empty windows, and piles of things outside.) and I would be in terror again. That made Jeeze mad when I said, or actually thought that. (All of the speaking was done through telepathy, but I cried and moaned constantly.) But it seemed that I was set up, because he could induce my thinking, even though I really felt that way at the moment. It is so amazing because it was as if I were talking directly with my thoughts, and I knew him from before, but I wasn't sure from when or where. It was an invisible force with a very strong presence in the whole room, that made clunking and squeaking noises off and on.
Then there would be a spell of I love you, I love you, or a feeling of total pity for myself, and I'm saying "Why me." Then either the "kiss" noise, or a total feeling of love and caring would overtake me.
Then he would try to make me feel angry at him, because he tricked me. I'd say "No no." Then he'd make me feel proud, and right then scare me again with a loud thump or noise, and I'd be in terror again.
There was a respect and a trusting fear in me now, that actually made me feel stronger and more secure, just knowing he had so much power. Later when the wind started whipping again, I kind of moaned with a fearful trusting giggle moan, over and over in a crying heavy breathing fashion. Now I trusted him even though I was afraid. I breathed heavily, and uttered crying moans continuously the entire time.
Feelings of fear, love, anger, pity, and sex were crossed back and forth. (A lot of sexual crossing with other emotions was done in the therapy with my mom as the object, and also some with Jeeze.)
(When I was a baby, I must of had a traumatic falling out or something. I went back to that state. I was actually living the subconscious childhood turmoil over, and integrating it into my present mind. They (Jeeze) came to me when younger, when I was in this same turmoil state, and they poured out all the love on me, even though I was fighting, and that is why I know and trust them. That is why the process of getting to know them again is tied up with the early childhood feelings. I was a fighting mad baby, and my parents couldn't deal with me. They even gave me away to the Navaho Indians for two years, while doing their internship, being doctors working on the reservation. It is something I have to always work on, trying not to feel anger, and to find forgiveness. I have to love myself and others, and put the past behind. That is part of the mystery of how I lucked out into being their child.
It (the therapy) just kept going on and on for hours. There was a reassuring again, and later there would be wind whipping, and soon I felt a calmer trusting, and was not as afraid.
There was another session of being totally dead and gone forever with nobody. I could see myself laying in a grave buried in sand in a nice shady place by a creek I used to walk. I saw myself just dead and gone with nobody, and then went into a crying fit so hard, that I couldn't breath, and just made a crackling sound like in the movie The Exorcist. My chest was so tight that my face was turning blue, and with a raspy choking or throwing up sound. That was all that would come out, and I was just utterly dead in self pity. This went on for a minute and a half or two. Then a calming period of "Oh oh why me?" Then, "I know, because you love me." Then, "I love you, I love my mom, my dad, everybody." Now I loved everybody even more after that.
Then towards the end, there was a session of feeling sorry for myself, and starting to bite my clenched index finger, biting hard and chewing on it, trying to eat or hurt myself, and it almost felt good. Then all of a sudden I started sucking like breast feeding, and just sucked and sucked, and then felt slightly sexually aroused.
Often at times like this, I would give myself reassuring pats on the back or chest, also rubbing my cheek and forehead with a downward motion as if wiping tears down. Sometimes I would wrap my arms around my abdomen and pull up, or pat my belly, or inside of loin, rub my forearm, the top of my hand and fingers, rubbing back and forth. This was done every time when reassuring the love of myself. I felt it was from the spirit through me, and it made me feel whole, calm and relaxed.
Then the wind kicked up again, but I wasn't afraid. Then oddly, there was a session of imagining myself dropping down a hole like a fence post hole, and then dropping feet first off a bridge into dark water. Then seeing myself just cut up in pieces: An eyeball, set of teeth, cut off head, leg, foot, like a morbid picture I saw somewhere once, of a head with the top off and random scattered body parts. Then I saw me just fizzle out like a body that was a splash of water, that contracted in on itself into nothing. A squirt of light shrinking into itself and disappearing, like I gave up the ghost or something.
Then was starting to raise myself up to wipe my red eyes that were kept tightly shut the whole time, and there was a calm peculiar feeling. I had cried so heavy for a few hours it seemed. (Then I saw an image in my mind, of Jeeze in a white robe, walking out the right exit sign below, near the screen of the movie theater in Ukiah. He pushed the big red curtain aside and walked out down the tunnel. I thought "What does that mean?" Then it hit me: "The show's over." Jeeze's presence was gone now.
I looked out the window near my bed, and there were two bright red orange cats eyes glowing. A big orange house cat was sitting on a big orange rock, watching me from about twenty feet away. It is true that the rock was even a dark orange. There was the little orange light seen skittering across the ceiling on the evening before they first showed up, and now the orange cat with a glow in the dark red orange eyes, on the orange rock was the very last thing seen. Jeeze had left right before this. (It took almost three years before I realized this orange light connection.)
I have the feeling the spirits could sometimes reside in animals like birds or cats. The next day there were two doves by my trailer. Two doves had also flown over my window before they came, and two landed in the path nearby. All the birds seem unusually chipper, even though I do feed them.
Another thing I didn't mention was that I had the feeling there were five shorter beings standing at a distance to the left side of my bed, and having pity on me during the major therapy session. The one tall head being (Jeeze) stood over me with hunched shoulders, and was on the left. All this was thought in my mind, but when I took a peek sometimes, there wasn't anyone there.
SMOKE
There was a smell of burnt wood or smoke, when I walked in the trailer on the second night. I knew they were waiting for me, and was a little afraid, but knew I had to go through with it. Thinking back, it was a odd scary feeling, but I felt a trust of them. Sometimes I thought "What if I just left," but knew I didn't want to. There was a reassuring spirit that gave me the courage to face the unknown. That night I took off my pants and laid them on the floor by the side of the bed, as a rug, or welcome mat. This was the night of the three kisses.
SAD FAREWELL
One time they gave me a feeling that they were going to leave now, and I was saying "I don't want to go, I want to go with you," and was crying like a little kid. They gave me the feeling I had to stay. I felt so sad, and actually didn't want to live on the earth anymore. It seemed there was nothing here to be happy for. This must of been a feeling from a long time ago, when I knew them as a child, and didn't want to have to go back and leave them. This feeling was so strong, and that must be where I developed such a strong dedication towards them.
I think this happened in the middle of the night after the three kisses, and later they were calming me with the moving blue blob shapes in the vision.
That night, sometimes the roof would creak, but still it (the spirit) stayed, and I knew we had to part, and said "I want to go with you," but knew I had to stay, and it was so sad to have him go. I said "I have always been alone," and cried and cried, and somehow it had me know that it was my purpose to help people. Finally it slowly put me at ease and seemed to be holding my hand and standing to the side more. I was relaxed and knew I was its special one that it took so much pity on, and showed so much love, and it would watch over me. I wouldn't be alone in this world, and some day we would be together again... that I should just live and help my family, and everybody. It gave me such a feeling of pity and love for people and myself, that I just cry every time I think of it. I realized that my purpose is to help people, because they were all so helpless and need help in this world. The spirit had so much love that it is beyond comprehension... and then I knew it was gone. The others (five shorter ones) were gone also. I knew they wanted to make me whole so I could help people.
I had such anger toward the world. It is hard to figure out how I can hate so much, and love so much at the same time. They made me feel love for others.
MANNA FROM HEAVEN
I ran up to the winery that one morning, (the third morning, after the night of the walk with God) and President Carter was being inaugurated into office on the TV. I said to my mom, "I think I'm supposed to be God's ambassador or something," and she didn't understand at the time what I meant. I didn't even bother trying to explain too much, but tried to say a little, saying "I was visited by aliens."
I had the feeling I had been up all night walking with God, because there was this warm glow around me, and a sweet smell.
They fed me some sweet food that gave off a aroma in my armpits, or it could also have been from the shirt I was wearing, which had a sweet herb scent.
I knew they had fed me during the last two nights, (the second and third evening of the encounter) because I had to go to the bathroom, and couldn't figure out why. I hadn't eaten at all the day before, and also the next day, except for a few oranges, having totally lost my appetite. The dung appeared to be a slightly green sweet smelling semi-fibrous vegetable matter. I should have saved a sample, but at the time didn't think of it. It was washed into the open outhouse pit from the heavy rain the one day, and I didn't think it was even recognizable then, when I went back to see if it was possible to save a sample. The other time, I used the bathroom at my family's big house, and it was long gone down the drain. It is actually true that I was fed, but I don't really recall how.
There was also a scraping of skin on the inside of my cheek in the mouth, (left side) and a small sore I thought was a needle hole toward the ear that was healing, further up on the inside of the cheek, on the side of the upper jaw. I think they also scraped skin from the lower intestine, because of a pain and a slight hemorrhoid. I also had a sore back the next day. There was a vague recall of sitting at a table at a large cafeteria, like the one from my old high school. This was recalled later during the day. This was the message that I was fed, but I'm not sure it is the way it happened.
Later that morning, my brother and I drove and walked about, looking at the flooding water in different places. When at the upper reservoir, I looked at the very full lake. That is when the first recall of what happened last night came back. It was the red sea scene with the man waving the stick, and all the people in white robes. It was another full day before I remembered the first part of the walk with God.
THE STORM
There were two transformer fires in Ukiah the night of the storm, for I have the news paper with the report on the January 21. I have heard that UFO's get their power from power lines and can ruin transformers. (I don't believe now that this was connected.)
The storm was a good tool for the therapy sessions to produce the desired goal without having to use outright unrealistic miracles during the initiation process. As I said before, sometimes the thunder would coincide with when Jeeze got angry. There were times when I was made to feel proud or very angry, and then the thunder would hit, or the wind rock the trailer. They knew the exact timing, because of an ability to see into the future, and so could coincide the process at the exact time of an induced emotional process in the therapy. I didn't know those secrets at the time, but see this now. This also explains how the song on the radio will coincide with your thought or dream.
THE OPEN BOOK
It seems they knew me like an open book, almost as if I were on their computer. They jumped out of my unconscious, because they knew every corner of my mind, even things I hadn’t thought of in years; and they could become, or were the motion behind my dreams. They were part of my conscious and unconscious, and had the ability to be in or out of my consciousness, for when I was awake I knew he was there conversing with me.
THE FIRE
My whole place burned up in a fire two or three months before they came. It was a massive pile of junk. The fire was started by an electrical wire shortage in the grass, further up at the main ranch. I feel that the fire was a blessing in the skies so to speak, for it saved so much work, and was the beginning of my road to resurrection from the mess I was in. I feel the spirits caused this now, but didn’t know that then. One can't ever underestimate the power of God.
RADIO QUIT
They also can make your radio quit working, or make the station fade out, for during the three day encounter the radio was turned off three or four times. This even happened once a few days before they came. At the time I thought it was broken, but then it was working again. I checked the wires but sometimes it wouldn’t work. This happened on the night when they first came. Later during therapy session they turned it off a few other times when it interfered with the program. Once the station was just phased out to a static. I left it on continuously, and they would always answer my thoughts with a song. That was their most common way of playing with me. Later I realized that the program on the radio wasn't even the regular station. It was piped in. (I'll talk about this later.)
PARTING CLOUDS
There are a few miracles that are hard to believe. One was on the very first day while at a friend’s house. I had been putting the pieces together from the night before, and was telling my friend about the vision of the saucer ride, and was thinking of all the other strange things that happened last night.
There was the smell of smoke before it happened. A thin layer of smoke from my friend's chimney actually floated down, and crossed my face once, and caught me off guard. That seemed rather unusual at the time. It was a cloudy overcast day, and I thought maybe the cool air had lowered the smoke like that. A little later while sitting in the garden I said “I think it has something to do with the sun or light," and I looked toward where the sun seemed to be, and right at that very instant the cloud opened up and a single beam of light poured out and blinded me. There was a big patch of light only in the one garden area, and everywhere else it was still darker. I knew right then that it was them, and my face was burning with warmth. I became so shocked that my face started turning red and I couldn’t stop shaking, and was saying “Oh my God, I think I’ve been abducted,” and was in a state of shock. I sat in his little shop house later, and my body felt hot, like a hot flash that made my back and the back of the neck, and face burn with warmth, and I kept shuddering, saying "Oh my God I've been abducted," over and over. That was such a amazing time, just thinking back. Also, it seems they were doing this a few other times, but not quite as dramatic.
The one day when my brother and I were going around looking at all the high water in the reservoirs and rivers, it seemed that there was always a clear patch of sky above us, and everywhere else it was raining. I remember once when I was waving a stick across the river, the same way as in the dream of the red sea I had just recalled; and there was a patch of clear sky overhead then. This even seemed to happen when we went to another area. I had the feeling then that they were doing that for us. This was the day after the walk with God. I was already used to the idea of induced thought and emotion, having been with the spirit so much, and I had the feeling the spirit was actually doing this. There were times much later when I was caught in a down pour, and I wished they could do that again. The strange thing about this is that I felt so self conscious, and it was hard to believe this was happening only for me. Why me? I often wondered how difficult it was for them to do those things, and felt unworthy for being glorified to such a extreme. That is why I want to tell others. When these things happened, the other people with me didn't even see what I was seeing. I thought that maybe these miracles could be done with simple electrical force fields. Later there were a few other times when the sun appeared to peek out at me, and I would bow down and worship it, and talk to Jeeze.
TELLING THE CHURCH
It took awhile to get over the extreme unworthiness and guilt of feeling put in such a exalted position, and I became self-conscious and went to Jehovah Witness's church and told a few people there what happened. I actually went there the evening after the second night of the encounter. It was during a Thursday evening bible study. I said to the one preacher: “Have you ever heard of flying saucer and the bible being connected?” He said “God destroyed that race of evil giants long ago, and flying saucers are evil forces, and God will destroy them.” I was shocked, for I just didn’t want to have to tell him, and I said “Do you think they might breed people?,” for I had the feeling that this might be what was happening to me. I was even in love with his daughter, and was asking the spirits to breed me with her the night before, if you can believe that.
I was having much sexual feelings the night before, and felt they wanted me to breed, and I was fantasizing about her and hoping they would breed me with her. I remember a thought came into my head that said “You have to ask her father.” The spirit actually told me this the night before.
And when I said to the preacher who was the girl's father: “Do you think they might breed people?,” he said “Oh, they were a evil race that would come down and molest our women, and God will destroy, or did destroy them.”
And I said “Well, what if they took the sperm of a guy and somehow bred you?” He said “Oh no, God destroyed them,” and I said, “Don’t you think that beings that are this intelligent would have to be nothing but good?” He said, “Oh, no.” You can imagine how I felt, for I just didn’t want to have to tell him. Then I said “Well, I think it just happened to me.” When I said this, I was in a state of shock, but under control, and he kind of stepped back. There were at least two persons who overheard.
Anyway, I came back every Sunday, and it was at that time in their studies they were saying “The discreet slave is somewhere in the room; the “anointed one.” I just "knew" they were talking about me, and was shaking and red in the face. I kept it a secret while preparing my story, and was on the top of the world and feeling so important that I was the one who had the “message from God” they were always waiting for. I kept my identity a secret, but thought that some elders knew I was the discreet slave, they kept talking about.
Finally I wrote the basic story of my walk with God down, and gave it to the girl I was in love with, as a honor to be the first person to receive this “message from God;" for she never paid attention to me, and maybe now she would think me worthy. Her name was Eden, and on the rolled up papers that looked like a scroll (for I remembered one verse in the bible that said, “Don’t forget the parcel, or parchment,” which meant the writings of the message from the spirit to one of the apostles.) I wrote “From the Son of God to the Garden of Eden,” and gave it to her discreetly outside the church, and said to her: “Don’t take this too seriously, it's pretty far-fetched;” for I knew it was going to blow her away.
Later it seemed she was looking at me strangely and trying to avoid me. Awhile later I asked her dad “What do you think of the story?” He said “I think you have a good imagination.” I got angry and said “Well you better start believing me.”
I even wrote them a whole other version of my story with as many details as possible, just like I’m doing now; except now I can even tell you more, because the spirit came back again when I saw the light and was floating immobilized and buzzing while awake etc. Just believe it. (This is talked about later.)
They thought I was crazy, or had the devil in me, and were paranoid. I was dumbfounded, and realized what kind of burden this will be, and how I must learn to live with rejection, for I was already used to that, and can understand that it isn’t going to be easy to get people to believe. That is why I’m writing a long long letter.
Later I told the preacher, (the dad of the girl) “Aren’t you going to tell anybody?,” because now he had two copies of the story. He said “No, we aren’t.” I asked "Don't you believe?" He said “We don’t believe it, or disbelieve it.” I said to give me the story back, because I didn't want to waste the writing, and had many others to tell, and he wasn't going to help me.
Awhile later I told some other people and a pastor there, and they said “Satan comes as a messenger of light.” That’s all they would say. And here I was thinking I was the discreet slave. It was an honor while it lasted.
Then I found out that some of them didn’t even recognize Christ. They said he was just another apostle, and said the trinity was evil and a symbol from Babylon, a wicked city. That’s when I knew something was wrong. These people are paranoid, for as you can see in my story, there are examples of the trinity in the candles, spires, group of Lilly-pads, etc.
THREE QUICK KISSES
When in the Mission Thrift store in Ukiah, I was looking through the used book section of religious books. Some books were fraudulent, and some more precise. Back then I was very superstitious, and felt many religious books were tainted with evil influence. I picked up a small book by Pat Robertson, called “Life’s 200 Most Asked Questions.” I knew the spirit was with me then, for it was right after the three day encounter. I turned slightly around and showed the book, backwards over my left shoulder, and asked ”Is this a good book?" and then heard three kiss noises kind of quick, like somebody going "tisk, tisk, tisk." When the tip of the tongue touches the roof of the mouth and air is sucked in, a kiss sound is made. This was very distinct, and I was not shocked then for some reason; but whenever I think about it I'm so amazed that the spirit is either with me or was hanging out here, because there is a little church room next door there. I’ve tried to get it to make that noise again, but it won’t, although a few times I thought I heard it faintly while asking serious questions lying in bed at night. It has a way of becoming so faint that you wonder if it was really there. This was the same major kiss noise that was over my bed on the second night of the encounter, when I was in extreme fear mixed with sexual feelings. It was also heard a few times at the tail end of the encounter on the early evening during the major therapy. As I said before: one time I said “Why me?" and was sobbing heavily, and then heard a kiss, and I knew, because a thought came into my head that said “Because we love you.” I cried with such joy, even though I was feeling much self-pity at that time. There was another time when I said “I won’t write a book about this,” because I felt that would be capitalizing on a gift, and then heard a kiss. At the time I felt they meant to "not do that," but as it turns out, it was a kiss that acknowledged me for feeling that way then, because they have since given me many messages saying to write a book.
VIOLENT FEELINGS
When I think of the being or force of some entity standing over me on the second night, I wanted to lash out and grab him in a violent way and pull him into me, for I really love him so much. But why am I giving off these violent reactions of wanting to grab him violently and just crush him? I really want to grab him violently and pull him
into my body and spirit, for I really have deep love for this thing.
He is like a God to me as much as he scared me and made me feel like he could destroy me, I still love him so much that I want him to destroy me. I will do anything he says, and feel guilty when I want to lash out, for all he has done for me.
I hope he can forgive me, for really he is my idol. Like my dad, he is a God to me. He is God and I want him to destroy me if he wants to, for I am his slave forever, and have a deep respect forever. I will never forget this and what he has done for me. I want to be with him forever, and slowly he will form me to the way he wants, and there will be no guilt, anger or fear.
I am still a little afraid. This was written a month or so after the encounter, when I was still feeling strange fighting feelings. It is much different now. Just last April 3, that Saturday morning, the dream of the light getting me has also unlocked a crying baby in me from long ago. "Waa waa," like a little baby, and I seem to have lost that hitting feeling, like wanting to strike out when disappointed.
BRIGHT PURPLE LIGHT
It was on the morning of April 3rd, a few months after the major encounter, that I was in a very lucid dream. I was filling five gallon water jugs on the old cement with rock wall foundation of my now torn down spiral house. (I couldn't afford the taxes) It was at night and was raining. I brought one jug of water to what seemed like a house that had lights in the windows. This low one story house was where the old blue trailer (that I had the major encounter in) was, but looked like a house. Then I went back out into the storm to get more water, and recall the light from the house reflecting through the rain and off the wet cement. When going to fill the other five gallon jug, a thought came, that I should watch out for lightening, for my father always warned about that when there was a storm at night. Right when thinking that, I looked up and there was a light that looked like a bright star at first, but it just quickly was a bright bright wobbly lite purple light that was coming right at me from the west where Venus is. It stayed the same size and was wobbling slightly, like someone holding a very bright big violet flashlight, but more like a welding light, it was so bright. The brightness of magnesium burning is similar. It came at a slightly downward horizontal motion, and seemed to be approaching, but stayed the same size. This was so vivid. There was a feeling of extreme panic, knowing it was going to get me, and right then I was hit with a blast that knocked me on the ground and I was just buzzing floating. The blast came from the inside of my chest, just like someone whacked me on the back real hard and knocked the wind out. I hit the deck of the floor and awoke right then in an intense vibrating floating buzzing. I was now laying in my bed awake, and was hearing the radio playing, and still floating in this intense vibration much like an electrical shock. Not a single muscle could be moved. "Waaaaaaa," I was immobilized. I knew they were going to take me and said "Yea, yea, I want to go, I want to see you, take me, take me, I'm yours" There was some fear, and I was so amazed at being able and willing right then to be taken.
This was reliving an earlier abduction, and I thought they were really taking me, for all this was so real. Somehow I really had no fear.
I am now wide awake and don’t want to open my eyes, and am still floating. I can still hear the radio playing also. That is why I knew they were really right there. I then am getting ready to accept whatever, and become anxious because nothing is happening and I’m not going into the spiral feeling. I then somehow was able to clench my left hand, and instantly the intense immobilized vibrating floating goes away. Everything becomes calm, and I now can feel my bed again while laying on my stomach. I feel disappointed, but am in joy at having been given this blessing. I have overcome a great fear and am ready for whatever comes next. This was a super virtual reality dream, as real as life is, and with supernatural vibrating.
The dream of the light getting me has also unlocked a crying baby in me from long ago. "Waa, waa," like a little baby. I seem to have lost that hitting feeling of wanting to strike out. In the dream, when the light blast hit me, there was a flash of anger, and wanting to strike out. Now instead of wanting to strike out when feeling disappointed or angry, I hear this cry, “waa waa,” and the hitting feeling that bothers me is becoming less real. for I don’t want to strike out at Jeeze.
The dream of the light getting me has also unlocked five dreams in a row. All these dreams just flooded my mind later that morning, after I had gotten up and was having breakfast. I had not thought of these old dreams once in 15 or 25 years, and now they are coming into my mind one after another, in a short period of time, right before I'm having breakfast. This is so strange. Something else is making this happen, and they must be behind this. It seems very likely that these are screen memory dreams of past visits when I was younger, for they have all come to light right after the abduction dream.
SCREEN MEMORY DREAMS
One dream was of flying machines that came over the mountain, and one crashed or landed on our property, and my dad and brothers ran out to the field and there was a man there it seemed, and I think I went for a ride, but it is vague. There was another where the whole mountain range in the East was on fire. There was another of a big house with a lot of different rooms and different people. One of riding motorcycles. The one of the house was a recurring one many times. There is another one of a warehouse with a group of people and different rooms and hallways that is also recurring. There was one of a train ride that was also recurring.
FAVORITE SONGS
Play the song “You are, you are the lamp unto my feet.” I really liked that one. I remember the song that goes: “Doesn’t anybody love him, doesn’t anybody see, doesn’t anybody love him the way "you" loved me?” Sometimes I thought it meant “The way God loved me,” because I loved him so much. They played that song for me it seemed, and those songs always started playing right when I thought of Jesus, and I either felt self pity or love for the spirit. There was a way the spirit would blend with mine, and then respond to my thoughts with the songs. I had been going through a grieving phase for a few months after they came, because I had lost them for so long, and had much love for them when younger. This is part of the mystery of why I'm so dedicated to the cause.
LITTLE CUTS
When they came back a month or so later, they did a check-up on me, and put little cuts on my little finger, abdomen and on the side of index finger also. I didn't know about this until I read a book about it, and even then didn't look until the first small scar on the side of the index finger was almost gone. I did see a slightly larger fresh scar on my stomach one morning, and found a perfect maybe two day old scar on my little finger, that was made when the hand was clenched. The small cut was right over the fold of skin on the outside of the little finger, and when the hand was folded, the two halves would match perfectly. I think this one was made one night when I had a nightmare a couple of days before. They were doing a checkup on me and I woke up feeling angry and said "Please Jeeze, I don't want to feel this way." It seems that one day, I just had the notion to look and see the first small scar that was almost gone, and then recalled in the book (Communion by Whitley Strieber • Note 1.), the same thing had happened, but I wasn't positive it was really them at first. When it happened later a few times in the next few days, I knew it was really them. I recall trying to tell my brother: "The aliens put this little cut here," showing the proof, and he had a hard time believing and said I could of cut it accidently on a thorn. I later showed him the cut across the side of the folded little finger, but it was still too much to believe. It seems that after I had read about he small cuts, it then started happening. I had even read that book once before I knew, I also was a contactee, and had to reread it because I forgot a lot of details. I was in a phase then of trying to find any books or information relating to the aliens, and was reading more then ever before in my life.
The healing of the small cuts they put on your fingers or lower abdomen must symbolize the regenerating force of Christ, and is a physical link to them.
In the book (The Andreasson Affair by Raymond Fowler • Note 2.), the Lady Betty Andreasson drew pictures of a three-sided pyramid, a burning Phoenix bird that turns into a worm, and a bunch of eyes that she saw. In the book, (Communion by Whitley Strieber), he says they put a little triangle on your shoulder, that makes you unconscious and leaves a red bump for three or more days. Twice I have had a red bump like that on my shoulder, that appeared overnight and was not a big pimple. There have been two times when my skin felt like there was a heat lamp next to me in the middle of the day. There have also been a few noises like a thunder clap in my head at odd times.
THE TWO FINGERS
One night I felt two fingers pressing on my skin. One from the back and one from the front, and my heart was in-between them. I was even laying on my back in bed at the time. I thought "Create in me a pure heart O Lord, for I am still struggling with conflicting feelings of pride and selfishness and anger and lust." Before this happened I was actually thinking of bringing a case of wine to the Jehovah's Witness church and handing a bottle to everyone, in celebration as they walked out the door. This was a foolish idea, but at the time I was so amazed and wanted to tell others. As it turned out, nobody wanted to even hear about it and thought I was either crazy or visited by Satan. The whole idea scared them. I was in a totally different world, and my judgment was way off at times. This was a month or more after they came. I was just so amazed then, and wanted to tell anybody who would listen.
POUNDING NOISE
There were pounding noises on the roof that happened weeks later when I moved to a different place. The noises were very loud on a tin roof, like somebody hitting it with their fist. This happened right when I was thinking “I know you’re there.” This has only happened once real loud, but other times they will make wood squeak really loud. It is true, for it only happens when you talk to them. Sometimes they won’t respond or I will not get a response for a month. It comes in waves, but I leave it up to them what they want me to do next, for everything so far has been just getting acquainted and overcoming my fear.
It is obvious they come from a parallel universe, for they can “be there” invisible, and come out of thin air literally.
HOMOPHOBIC
It seems that a person can become homophobic after going through an ordeal like this. I've had a few dreams of being accosted by male characters who seem to pose a threat, trying to sexually assault me. I know that having been exposed to a lot of fears that so many people are gay, that this could be just an overreaction.
In studying Philemon, I have learned more the true meaning of Philemon. The apostle Paul has written a letter begging someone to please forgive a runaway slave, in a time when slavery was legal and even Christianity couldn't change quickly the ways of the world. Paul begs this person to understand the situation and that Jesus died for all our sins, that the wrongs of the world could be overcome, and to have empathy for our fellow humans. Also, where it says "in the bowels," this refers to the center of the human soul where all emotion dwells, and is not some homosexual statement, but more like a deep deep love of butterflies in your stomach. The stomach is the center of the desire of man.
I am still learning, and as you know the Bible can be translated many ways depending on the person.
If they want to use me for breeding, I am all for it, because having never been a father on this earth, it would be a gift beyond belief. They could of used me for breeding when younger also, and I never knew it. That means my kids are grown up already.
PLAY GUITAR
When the spirit gave me the ability to play guitar excellently, but when I thought “I’m going to have to show others how good I am,” then all of a sudden I was playing terribly. This happened in the early evening of the third night of the encounter. They were telling me to not feel too proud, because I was getting glorified beyond measure, and it could go to my head. This reminded me to stay humble. I had all these feelings as it happened. Suddenly my fingers just couldn't make the sounds clean and flowing, and were fumbling when I got proud.
FIRST VISIONS
The sign of the open right hand is their symbol. It was held straight up with fingers together. I saw this hand in a vague vision, on the first night. It was the very first thing I saw, when I said “Give me a sign.” I didn't recall this until later the next morning.
The hand had long slender fingers. It was so long and slender, and it seems there were only four finger in total.
( Figure 1.)
FRAMES VISION
This is very important Family Radio! I have just realized what the visions mean. It has been since the early part of February when this happened, and I have not realized the significance of it until now. The visions were seen with eyes closed, when first waking in the morning, and lasted maybe five seconds, then faded out.
The two angels sat on the covenant and folded or pointed their wings together over the covenant. The cornerstone, or beginning of a new chapter, or frame for a picture is seen. The right angle is the building block of all matter. The right angle holds the secret of the covenant. The four frames stand for covenant, first fruits, doors opening, and waves.
Remember that the door of the church was open, and the person standing in it talked to us? Another words: the door is open, the covenant is revealed, the first fruits have come forward, and the word will travel on the waves. It took me quite a while before I figured out the meaning of the frame's vision.
( Figure 7.)EYES VISION
There was a vision of particles on the same morning, right before the eyes vision, and later was seen bubbling big dark gray-blue blobs slowly rising, similar to the oil light lamps with rising bubbles. These rising bubbles were actually in the same shape of the eyes. This must mean to stay calm, because they were like the slow moving blue blob shapes that calmed me before.
The vision of the eyes came a week or so after the frame's vision. At first I didn’t recognize they were eyes, but then they became clearer, and I could barely see little black eyeballs. Some of the eyeballs were crooked and not in the right place exactly. It was like Bullwinkle’s eyes, or a Goofy cartoons eyes, and there were just a whole mass of them, like bubbles; black eyeballs in white elongated bubbles. Both the frames and the eyeball visions were in black and white. The vision of the eyes lasted a long time, but took a long time to become clear. It was like I was trying to focus on them, and the center black irises finally became clear.
( Figure 8.)Rocky, the flying squirrel, and Bullwinkle, the moose is a idea they must have developed; since at that time I used to eat at Taco Bell a lot, and at the time, they (Taco Bell) were using Bullwinkle as their advertising mascot. I was eating Bullwinkle's food, and flying like Rocky the squirrel. I even had droopy eyes like Rocky and am a pack rat squirrel. The visions are the food, and the eyes are watching: just like in the cartoon when Bullwinkle watches as he helps Rocky perform his flying feats. It took almost three years after studying dreams, before I connected the idea of the food being the messages given. This happened when retyping the story. There are many overlooked riddles, because early on I didn't realize the extent of how much they know and how complex the messages can be.
The vision of the rectangle with two circles with crosses through them was seen in March sometime, in the morning when half awake. It was clear but vague, and lasted a few seconds. I thought it was a stained glass window in a door.
( Figure
9.)The vision of the square with the two overlaid crosses, or three sizes of squares: This also shows a right angle, or two rectangles. This was seen the first or second day of April, and appeared in the morning upon just awakening, with eyes still closed. It became slowly clear, and then faded. Lasted two or three seconds also.
( Figure 10.)Saw a vague vision of wavy seaweed or hair moving with an undulating motion, shaking slightly back and fourth, like small waves on the shore of a pond.
( Figure 10A.)There was another vision of what was like walking through a snowstorm, and the big flakes were moving horizontally, blowing across your face. It was very three dimensional because you could see flakes coming closer in slow motion, and some passing by the sides. Some just bombarded right into my face. (This was sometime in April.)
Twice, on two separate mornings, I've seen white spots that are small and stationary, like paint spots or speckles that are spaced out.
( Figure 10B.)
I first saw this once, and didn't think too much of it. Then I saw it a second time a week
or so later, and woke up right then and looked out the window right as the very first rays
of the sun just broke at the top of the mountain, and then the thought came in my head:
"The sun is rising." This is the first time "ever" I recall waking and
catching the first rays peep over like that. The next morning the "exact" same
thing happened, with the same thought of "the sun is rising," but not with the
spots right before that. I knew the spirit had done that, for the timing was exact, to see
the first rays breaking again. Then the next morning was another vision of the small white
spots on a blue background, and also waves started, and I could feel a vibration very
slowly that was a low frequency of the same type of higher frequency shaking buzzing,
(when they immobilize and float you, after being zapped with the light dream.) In this low
buzzing, my whole body felt a slow humming rocking undulating, like an electric motor
starting up, but with the rocking rhythmic effect. I could even then see waves in the
spots vision, that were slowly moving and mixed with the white dots on the light blue
background. 
( Figure 10C.) These
waves are similar to the flowing seaweed or wavy hairs shaking in unison, like in waters
undulating waves, of the earlier vision a few days ago.Now all these pieces have come together, for this is the third time I've seen the dots, the third time for the waves, and the third time for the sun also; for when I looked out the window right after this, I saw the sun not quite cresting this time. It was almost there, I could tell from the glow, and then the thought "The sun is rising" came again. This is the first time all factors were together with the very physical bodily slow shaking feeling. The fact that the sun hadn't quite shot its first rays over the horizon yet could mean that the message had not quite had time to sink in yet; for it was right after this when the sun's edge did first appear. By that time I was beginning to put the pieces together. Maybe it means something else though.
This must mean that particles and waves are two factors used when they give the buzzing feeling and levitate you etc. The bright violet light (in the scary abduction dream) is the color of the highest frequency wavelength visible to us. (I read this somewhere. There is even a group called the council of the violet light or something.) The fact that the wave feeling can be tuned to a variety of frequencies is another factor.
Microwaves effect the nerve synapses making the muscles pulse back and fourth against each other to give the buzzing effect. I read this somewhere also. (James M. Mc Cambells book Ufology • Note 3.) This was also the third time I had been given the "physical" wave feeling. The first time was high frequency in the abduction dream, the second time was a few days later, and was medium frequency, which was quite a amazing buzzing also, and the third was the very low frequency, when all the other factors were combined. The factors were: wave visions, spots visions, wave feeling, waking and seeing, and thinking "The sun is rising; all combined. Three times each factor has come, and now all together. After all this, there is no doubt I was being spoken to.
I had finally figured out what the frames vision and eyes meant; and also saw the two crosses visions, and then knew they wanted me to tell the churches. Then I began to write the story better so I could begin the letter writing project. I now had so much proof it was shocking.
Vision of dwarf’s head. This was vague but real, for I could see deep set shiny black eyes, a high brow, and maybe a outline of the top of a head. I saw this a few nights after all the other visions, and had been even thinking about that, after having read the book "Communion," where dwarfs with shiny black eyes were spoken of.
( Figure 11.)There was once a returned letter that said "wrong address," but wasn’t. It was a bad paranoid letter I wrote to "Mendocino Memo" that shouldn’t have been sent anyway; for then I was afraid somebody might get my address to hurt me somehow.
THE CLOCK
There is a vague remembrance I was standing in a city square and talking to someone. There were flag stones covering the square, and an old church with a tower and a big clock, like Big Ben was in the forefront; although it could have been a courthouse. The clock was in a square frame, and I think it read fifteen after eleven. I saw there were two raised corners on the square top like the points of a crown. This was just a vague remembrance of a dream. This was right before beginning the letter writing campaign, and a little after all the major visions. Can you imagine what a responsibility this would feel like? I was in a world of my own, and knew this was so very important. God had come to me and needed help to tell the world. I hoped I could at least live long enough to get the project done. I could find no support from others, and they were in another world, and really couldn't relate. I had to keep it to myself, because people got tired of hearing about it, and talking to close friends only brought controversy. I would leave a argument exhausted, and was learning that it really was a personal thing.